At the annual Gridiron Dinner Saturday night, President Biden joked that, “One candidate’s too old and mentally unfit to be president…and the other guy’s me.”

- It was really funny… until everybody realized Joe didn’t remember “the other guy’s” name.

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Oprah Winfrey displayed her new svelte physique as she walked the red carpet at the 2024 NAACP Image Awards on Saturday.

- She was so excited about dropping the extra pounds she offered to give everybody she saw a “New COMPACT Car!!!!!”

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The mystery of “KateGate” continues… with the Palace now saying William and Kate went shopping at a local Plant Nursery over the weekend - BUT - and it’s a Kim Kardashian sized BUT - there were no photographs taken to document the event. So… Was Kate really there? Where is she? Is she okay?

- I haven’t had this many questions since my Mother and Father sat me down and told me our dog had gone to live on a farm in Upstate New York with my Uncle Ozmer and Aunt Bertha.

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A New York City Burger King was hit with a $15-million-dollar lawsuit after it was accused of allowing an “open air drug bazaar” run by “professional” dealers… meaning people could get Meth or Coke when they dropped by for a Whopper and Fries.

- Well, the Burger King jingle DID SAY that “Special Order’s Don’t Upset” them.

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The results of a recent study suggest that restaurant patrons can be encouraged to tip a little extra if there’s a smiley-face emoji printed alongside the suggested gratuity on their check.

- And the evil, dagger eyed glare of the kid when they point to the computer screen and ask if you want to add a tip doesn’t hurt either.

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Health experts said that the best way to avoid a Hangover is to simply avoid drinking.

- Well it’s awfully nice of them to come out with that Info the day AFTER St. Patrick’s Day…

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick

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