A Southwest Airlines pilot is back at work after being suspended without pay when his microphone button got stuck. Air Traffic Controllers, other pilots, passengers and the mortified flight crew had to listen to his obscenity-laced rant about how the Southwest flight attendants were all old, gay, or so fat and ugly he wouldn’t want anyone to know he’d “banged” them.  He said Houston is the worst base with nothing but old guys and grannies.  But now he’s back in to cockpit after undergoing “sensitivity and diversity training”. 

- After his sensitivity training, he vowed he’d learned his lesson and from now on he’ll make sure his microphone is off! 

- Notice he said he wouldn’t want anyone to KNOW he “banged ‘em”.  He didn’t say he didn’t do it…

- I hope he never gets a job with Virgin Airlines or the plane will never even get off the ground!

- The flight attendants he slept with said he didn’t have too much to brag about… they said he had a really small carry-on and was known for his “early arrivals”.