Look Ma!  Clean Hands!

Researchers from a medical center in Salt Lake City have some good news:  more Americans are washing their hands after using the bathroom.  They sent spies into public restrooms and found that while only 77% of people washed up in 2007, that number has now risen to 85%.  As usual, men were dirtier than women: only 7% of ladies failed to wash their hands, while 23 percent of men skipped the soap and water after using the commode. 

NOTE:  The 15% who failed to wash their hands consisted entirely of restaurant employees.  Here’s an idea, why don’t they post a sign in the bathroom reading  “All Employees Must Wash Their Hands Before Returning To Work”.   Oh, wait…

How would like to have that job?  Spending all day observing people’s bathroom habits in public restrooms.  I thought you could get arrested for that. 

I actually knew a guy who did this for a living, but was sent to jail for being a “Peeping Tom”… now his career is “down the drain”… or “all washed up”.  (Take your pick!)

Waiter, I’d Like a Fly in My Soup…

A New York restaurant called the Brooklyn Kitchen is offering diners a rather unusual experience:  a four-course meal consisting entirely of insects.  The owner says patrons are “kind of interested, but also skeeved out.”  The menu includes Mexican-style caterpillars, mealworms and moth larvae, washed down with the Mexican liquor, Mescal.  The price $85 and 20 people have already made reservations.

They offer a discounted price to seniors who eat between 4 and 5 – “The Early Bug” Dinner.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve always preferred caterpillars prepared Cajun style.

By the way… if you see a cockroach on the table, that’s not part of the meal.  He just lives there. 

The problem with the moths is they won’t stay on your plate.  They keep flying towards the light. 

It’s home cookin’!  All the insects will be caught in the retaurant’s own kitchen. 

$85 dollars is a great deal… you get the entire meal of insects - from soup to nuts!

It’s Not Just Humid, It’s HOT!

Men’s Health magazine compiled a list of American’s 100 top “hotbeds of sex” and 7 of the 10 cities are in Texas.  Austin was ranked #1 for sexual activity and dubbed the “capital of copulation”.  Dallas was #2, Arlington 7th and Houston came in 10th.  Lubbock, Forth Worth and San Antonio also made the top 15. 

So Dallas came in number two, huh?  No wonder George Bush keeps putting that “Mission Accomplished” sign on his front yard. 

Years ago, the “capital of copulation” was a town called Little Rock, Arkansas.

But not everybody in the Lone Star State is canoodling.  After one pharmacy ran out of Viagra, men could be heard yelling, “Houston, we have a problem”. 

Detroit should be on that list.  After all, isn’t that where the former Mayor lived?  And partied?  (allegedly!)

One Half Of Wham! In a Jam!

George Michael has had seven run-ins with the law, most involving marijuana and driving, be he kept getting released or given community service.  But his luck has changed.  In July, George smashed his car through the side of a photography shop on his way home from a gay pride parade.  He was high at the time and now a judge has sentenced him to 8 weeks in prison.

When the verdict was read, George allegedly broke down in tears, yelling, “Only eight weeks?  C’mon!” 

So he’ll be locked up in a tiny room with a toilet and a tattooed stranger… or as George calls it, “a typical Saturday night”.

I think what he really needs is a “Father Figure”.

He has a history of falling asleep at the wheel on his way to meet men at public restrooms.  Now I finally understand the meaning of “Wake Me Up Before You Go! Go!”

I’ll Bet a Huge Party Will Be Throne! 

A big Happy Birthday to England’s Prince Harry who turns 26 today…

I’ll never forget the time we had “The Queen” on the show talking about her grandson’s birthday when she said, “I just can’t believe my little Harry is getting so big!”

Headline of the Day…

 (As reported by the AP)  “Missing Tortoise Found, Didn’t Get Far”. 

 And Finally…

R.I.P. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer!  Billie Mae Richards, the voice of Rudolph dies at 88. We’ll miss you and have no doubt that “you’ll go down in history”!


Have a great Wednesday.  See you back here tomorrow!

- Dick 




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