Hometown Boy Does Bad…

Police in Ferndale are looking for a man who robbed a convenience store Monday while wearing a Darth Vader mask.  But he made what they call a “significant mistake” when he unknowingly stood in front of a store surveillance camera while he put on his Darth Vader Mask.  So now they know what he really looks like. 

I’m just glad he didn’t put his pants on in front of the camera.  That’s one light saber I don’t need to see. 

Police don’t believe he had an accomplice, they say he was working “Han Solo”.

As he fled the bank he was overheard yelling, “May the Police Force Be With You!”

If only he’d disguised himself as Yoda, he would have been too short to be seen on Camera! 

What’s Not To Like?  

The Daily Mail Reports that French First Lady Carla Bruni has co-written a tell-all book, “Carla and the Ambitious”, that’s sure to upset a lot of famous people.  Among them: Michelle Obama.  Bruni says that she once asked Michelle what it was like being America’s First Lady and she allegedly replied, “Don’t ask!  It’s hell!  I can’t stand it!”

She went on to tell Carla that she should include more fruits and vegetables in her diet.

I’d hate being First Lady too if I only got one weeks vacation a month!

I know Mrs. Salahi, the famous White House party crasher, would be happy to take her place!

Lick ‘Em If You Got ‘Em

A medical marijuana dispensary in California is offering customers a healthier alternative to smoking pot.  They’re putting it in ice cream.  Each half-pint laced carton contains the equivalent of eight joints worth of pot.  The ice cream has names like “Banannabis Foster” and “Straw-Mari Cheesecake”.  Despite the $15 price, customers are going crazy for the stuff.

$15 bucks for ice cream?  Isn’t that a little high? 

They call the guy behind the counter the “Really Good Humor, Man”.

The hardest part is getting a roach clip big enough to fit around the carton. 

Cheech and Chong said the pot part is okay, but not the ice cream part.  Their doctor won’t let them eat it because of their high cholesterol problems. 

If that’s not enough to get you high, the ice cream cone is made of hemp. 

He’d Give You the Can Off His Back

A Spanish inventor has spent the last ten years perfecting what he calls “Fabrican” – the world’s first spray on shirt.  The can contains a mixture of cotton fibers and plastic polymers.  Once the spray touches the skin, it immediately dries and turns into a stretchy fabric that can even be washed and worn again.  He envisions that someday, people will spray on not just T-shirts, but pants, hats, swimwear and dresses.

Sports Illustrated will be able to dress an entire Swimsuit issue of models using only one can of the stuff… and still have some left over!  

So 20 years from now the expression will be, “Hey, I just spray on my pants one leg at a time just like everybody else.”

Brittney Spears is said to be thrilled!  It’s a whole new kind of underwear she’s not going to wear!

I’ve got news for this guy… That Mexican news chick that covers the NY Jets already beat him to the punch. 

A Look Ahead to Tomorrows Look Back… Huh?

89 years ago tomorrow, RCA demonstrated the first “LP”, or long-playing record.  

There will now be a slight pause while you explain to your kids what a “record” is.  

And on tomorrow’s date in 1983, Vanessa Williams became the first black Miss America.  Although she was forced to give up her crown when nude photos of her surfaced, she’s one of the few Miss Americas who went on to become a star. 

Of course today you can be photographed naked and still star in Disney’s “High School Musical”!


Have a great day and we’ll see you back here tomorrow!

- Dick 

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