Jonathan Gruber, the MIT health economist who helped craft the Obamacare bill, says his children have talked him into creating a comic book that will explain the health care reform bill to confused Americans.
- It’ll be the world’s first 2000 page comic book.
- Ironically, the guy who most needs health care right now is a comic book hero known as “Spider-Man”.
On this day in 1933, the Postal Telegram Company of New York introduced the singing telegram.
- Up until then, you had to find out your grandpa died without the catchy melody.
Have a great day and I’ll see you right back here tomorrow!
- Dick
Kudos to Chrysler! The two-minute commercial they ran during the Superbowl that showcased not only their Chrysler 200 but the city of Detroit has gotten national attention. The spot, featuring Eminem, even got a segment on NBC Nightly news. And a lot of people saw it… a whole lot… 162.9 million people to be exact. (If you don’t count those who “answered natures call” when it aired).
This year’s game was the highest rated television program is history, followed by last year’s Super Bowl featuring the Colts v. Saints, and the final episode of M*A*S*H 
which moved to number three. As for the effectiveness of the commercial, after the game, “Chrysler 200” was the second most searched term on Google, beating out the halftime act, “Black Eyed Peas”. In fact, traffic at the online car research site Edmunds.com shot up an astounding 1619% for the Chrysler 200 in the hours after the game.
SIDE NOTE: The Super Bowl ad voted most popular by viewers was the commercial featuring a young boy telling his mother’s date to keep his hands off his mom and his Doritos!
And now… on with the news!
Another pick-me-up for Detroit… Today, independant film producer/director, Phillipe Martinez, will publicly unveil his new movie studio, Maxsar Digital Studios, in Livonia. The full-service studio is already up and running, with Michiganders doing everything from screenwriting to casting to film editing. The studio is currently working on “Scar 23”, a $23 million dollar sci-fi thriller. The studio hopes to employ 100 Metro-Detroiters by December.
- According to the trailor, “Scar 23 re-creates the terrifying story of Joan River’s 23rd facelift”.
- If you only see one movie made at a studio in Livonia this year, make it this one!
- Big Al auditioned for the film, but was turned down since it’s not being filmed in the wide-screen format.
The TSA has given permission to airport security screeners to unionize, and it’s set off a battle in Congress. The TSA says it will just give them collective bargaining over things like work shifts - but will not grant the power to go on strike. But Senate Republicans say letting union bosses into the airport screening process could lead to a homeland security disaster. 
- Basically you’ll be able to get through security with an AK-47 in your pants… as long as you wait for the unionized screeners to go on their mandatory break!
- So if I time it right, does this mean I won’t have to take my shoes off anymore?
- During invasive pat-downs the union guys won’t be looking for junk in your trunk, they’ll be looking for Jimmy Hoffa!
Ex-MSNBC liberal commentator Keith Olbermann has landed a new job. He’s reportedly moving to Al Gore’s Current TV Channel. An anonymous source told the NY Times that to get Olbemannn, they had to give him a stake in Current TV.
- Which is known on Wall Street as “The Worst Stock…IN THE WORLD!”
- They signed the deal in the Arctic Circle while they were up there looking for cracks in the ice.
- With Olbermann’s reputation as being extremely hard to deal with, look for Al Gore’s new documentary, “An Inconvenient Keith”.
An AP-Weather Underground poll found the recent freezing weather has had serious effects on people’s romantic moods. 8% said winter makes them feel sexier than any other season, and two-thirds said their sex lives improved during the series of blizzards. Given a choice of ways to keep warm, more people chose cuddling-up next to someone else’s warm body than putting on a Snuggie.
- Why not do both? After all, the Snuggie keeps you warm and “keeps your hands free”!
- Speaking of which… they should make one for outdoor use called “The Shovelie”.
Not everyone’s temperature goes up when the thermometer drops. 15% of those surveryed said being stuck in the house because of snow and ice made them have less sex than usual.
- Of course that’s because the person they usually have sex with doesn’t live in their house.
Fans of Ken and Barbie are being asked to decide whether the couple should get back together. They broke-up in 2004, after 43 years of dating when Matel announced that Ken had “stepped out in a big way.” Soon after, Barbie began dating a surfer dude named Blaine. But Matel says it’s always been Ken’s intention to “win Barbie back” and has set up two Facebook Pages and BarbieAndKen.com to let fans vote on whether the two should get back together in time for Valentine’s Day.
- I think we all know that what Ken “stepped out of in a big way” was a closet!
- Don’t do it Barbie! If he didn’t propose after 43 years of dating, he’s NEVER going to going to pop the question!
- Barbie could use some good news… Just last week the banker from Monopoly foreclosed on her Mailbu Beach House.
- In related news… Barbie’s friend “Midge” is on pretend anti-depressants after getting a “Dear John” letter from G.I. Joe.
- HISTORICAL NOTE: Barbie is the only woman in California who was actually BORN with fake boobs.
On this day in 1922, President Warren G. Harding had the first radio installed in the White House.
- The very next day he called in and won tickets and a backstage pass to the Al Jolson concert!
Super Bowl XLV is history. It was a good game… and, sorry Steelers fans, but I was happy for Green Bay. But Pittsburgh fans weren’t the only losers. A lot of fans who didn’t have tickets, paid 200 bucks to stand in the stadium parking lot in the cold rain to watch the game on big TV monitors. Plus, just before the game started, the fire marshall ruled that hundreds of temporary seats inside the stadium weren’t safe so they were left empty, while 1200 people with tickets were told their seats were gone. Seats were found for most, but 400 people had to watch the game from the Stadium’s basement bar.
- You know, just like they do for free every week at home.
- They were really the lucky ones because they got to watch “Glee” before driving home!
- Just to get in the spirit, I poured a bottle of Gatorade on my wife Gail’s head after the game.
The musical portion of the game got mixed reviews. Critics slammed the Black Eyed Peas’ halftime show, calling it well-staged, but their performance stiff, lackluster and headache inducing.
- I kept waiting for Kanye West to jump up on stage and interrupt the show!
But the worst reviews were for Christina Aquilera’s overheated and pitch-wobbly National Anthem, during which she forgot the words and left out the “O’er the ramparts we watched” line. And she held out the final note for an agonizing 12 seconds.
- It made me long for the good old days of Roseanne Barr’s National Anthem, when she could get all the words right and scratch herself at the same time!
Chrysler spent around 9 million dollars for a two-minute commercial promoting the Chrysler 200, although the spot seemed to be more about Detroit than about the car. It featured Eminem at the end - walking into the Fox Theater and saying, “This is the Motor City… and this is what we do.” 
- Hey… If our team can’t be in the Super Bowl… at least our city can!
- The best part of the commercial? No Kwame!!!
Other personal favorites: The Chevy Cruise at the assisted living center where they kept yelling to “turn it up” and the E-Trade spot with the baby and the cat.
If you missed the Chrysler spot… here it is:
Men’s activist Marc Rodov is on a campaign to get American men to boycott Valentine’s Day. He claims it’s “the media’s annual male-bashing fest” that “artificially and unilaterally caters to women” who use it to coerce men into spending lots of money on them. Rudov says he used to fall for the “sextortion” but gave up 10 years ago. Despite efforts to get other men on board, he hasn’t been very successful. He claims it’s because “men are wimps” and they won’t boycott Valentine’s Day “because they’re afraid they’ll get rejected in the bedroom.”
- Men, make it easy on yourself, just pick up some candy at the local mini-mart when you gas-up some time this week!
- It’s not just Valentine’s Day, I’m guessing this guy gets rejected in the bedroom the other 364 days a year too!
- TIP FOR WOMEN: Buy yourself a box of chocolates and tell everyone you’re dating a guy named “Russell Stover”.
Speaking of Valentine’s Day… apparently Charlie Sheen has closed-up shop and gone out of the Hooker business. TMZ.com reports that Charlie texted his porn star girlfriends that “the party is over”. One message reportedly read, “Right now, we are on lockdown”. Another told the woman, “please lose the number please drive through…thank you.”
- Normally the hookers are the ones who close for business, but apparently in Hollywood the guys do.
- Charlie hung an “Out of Business” sign on his… front door.
William Shatner is back in the recording studio making a new album, this time in the heavy metal field. He’s reportedly cutting 20 songs, all with a theme of flying or space. His backup band includes members of “Deep Purple”, “Queen” and “Yes”.
- To which I say, “No!”
- If the album sells well, he might have a shot at getting booked at next years Super Bowl. I can hear it now… “Oh say… Can… You… See…”
- Hey, he can’t do any worse than Christina Aquilerra did last night!
- His fans can’t wait for the albums release and say they will “Klingon to every word!”
- You have to admit… Shatner’s a really enterprising guy!
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here tomorrow!
- Dick
I’ve never been a fan of “Reality TV Shows”… perhaps because there’s very little “reality” involved. But the situation in Egypt - being played out 24/7 on the cable news channels and consuming the network news - is about as real as it gets. And I find myself glued to the television as the situation changes on an almost minute-by-minute basis.
It’s astounding and addictive to watch it all live. First of all, I have to admire the courage and dedication of the anchors, reporters and camera crews who have literally put their lives on the line to cover the story. They started out broadcasting right from the streets in the midst of the protesters. Then, after some journalists were attacked and injured, (some “gravely”), they moved to the relative safety of hotel balconies. Then, the last couple of nights, they’ve been holed up in non-descript rooms, blinds drawn, sitting on the floor in a pool of dim light, so their locations are unknown to those who might harm them.
CNN’s Anderson Cooper continues to broadcast in-hiding despite having been hit in the head ten times by a bunch of thugs. It’s fascinating to watch him to “throw it” to another reporter in another location, also in a unidentified, darkened room.
NBC somehow got lead Anchor Brian Williams out the country. Last night he reported from Amman, Jordan - a dangerous place in its own right - and said he will be back at his desk in New York for tonight’s broadcast.
Why the protesters are attacking the American journalists isn’t clear. Usually in these situations, people want their stories told.
Despite the amazing coverage, I haven’t heard anyone talking about what triggered the Egyptian uprising so suddenly. After all, Hasni Mubarak has been in power for 30 years.
I stumbled on what appears to be the answer in an article in Newsweek magazine. Here’s a brief summation:
Approximately one month ago, a 26-old-man in Tunisia, rose as he did every morning and went to work. In his case, that meant pushing a cart filled with vegetables that he would sell to locals in an effort to support his family. (At just 26 - he was the major-bread winner for a family of eight). As he moved along the street, he was stopped by a policewoman who asked if he had a permit to sell the vegetables. He told her no, but offered to buy one. She said it cost $10 dollars and he explained that he only had $7 dollars and asked if she could adjust the price. Angered at what she apparently perceived as insubordination, she slapped him across the face. The man went to the police station to report the incident and was completely shut down. They did nothing to help him.
That evening he went home and went to bed as usual. Sometime during the night, his mother looked in the room to check on him and found him sleeping soundly.
That was the last time she saw him. Because when he arose that next morning, he got dressed as usual, went out onto the street, and set himself on fire. He died of his burns several days later. 
This act of self-immolation drew much public attention and as the story spread about why he had taken his own life in such a horrifyingly public way, the Tunisian people became so angry, they launched an uprising. Such was their fury, that within days, they caused the President of Tunisia to step down.
The young man became a hero in the Muslim world. (His actions were not considered an “Islamic thing” - but more of a plea for freedom for the people of Tunisia). Seeing how quickly change happened there, young people in Egypt became empowered and almost immediately took to the streets to try and oust Hasni Mubarak. Similar protests are occurring in Yemen and to a lesser extent Jordan and Algeria.
And so, in a span of just four weeks, we have witnessed a major uprising in much of the Middle East.
Of course, the big fear is that this will become an Islamic religious revolution… more than a secular revolution - and that Muslim extremists will end up in power. That worst-case-scenario would be tragic news for Israel and certainly for the United States and Europe as well.
And so, as I write this, the drama continues to unfold. And no one knows how it’s going to turn out. But I have a feeling that no matter what happens, I’ll be watching.
- Dick
One more thing… isn’t it interesting that while the whole world watches these events… the word “Egypt” has not appeared on a single television screen in China? Obviously the government fears another Tiananmen Square.
And, oh yes, one more thing. Green Bay 26. Pittsburgh 21.
Everyone knows that men are more into the Superbowl than women, right? Not so fast…
The dating website Zoosk.com surveyed over 1,000 singles who are all looking for relationships and the results may surprise you. 73 percent of the women said they would rather watch the Super Bowl than have sex. Only 50 percent of the men would rather watch the Super Bowl than have sex.
- However 100% of the men said they’d like to have sex while watching the Super Bowl.
- They referred to it as “The Ultimate Half-Time Show”. 
- Can you blame the women? Who wants to “canoodle” with a drunk guy wearing face-paint and a jersey with bean dip on it?
- Perhaps the women enjoy the game because of all those tight ends!
Art Experts have debated for years what makes the “Mona Lisa” so unusual and intriguing. Now an Italian art Historian has a new theory: She’s a guy. Silvano Vincenti claims that DaVinci had an apprentice who began working with him as a boy and grew up to become his trusted companion and likely lover. He believes you can see the apprentice’s slim, effeminate features in several of Leonardo’s works - and believes DaVinci used the man’s nose and mouth in his painting of Mona Lisa.
- I don’t buy it. If Mona Lisa was gay, she would definitely have worn something by Prada!
- Right now, Nat King Cole is spinning in his grave.
- I’ve always believed that Mona didn’t have much of a smile because she’d been getting Botox injections.
- He also claims that Vincent Van Gogh’s ear was actually cut off by members of a Mexican Drug Cartel.
Yesterday in Egypt, a gang of pro-Mubarak protesters attack CNN reporter Anderson Cooper’s crew and punched Cooper in the head about 10 times before getting away. Luckily, Cooper was not seriously injured.
- And they know that because doctors did a 360 degree scan of his head.
- How come this kind of stuff never happens to Geraldo Rivera?
- Anderson’s former CNN collegue Larry King said, “I’m shocked at the news… I thought Gary Cooper was dead!”
The New York Times reports that more and more hospitals are banning the use of video and cell phone cameras in delivery rooms until after the baby is born. 
Some parents are outraged saying, they have the right to capture one of the most important events of their lives. But hospitals say that they are protecting the rights of their staff who don’t want to have their pictures passed around or show up on YouTube.
- That’s not YouTube… it’s EwwTube!
- Think how great it will be when the kids grow up… they can watch their conception on an amateur porn site, then flip to another site and watch themselves being born!
- When push comes to shove, I think it should be up to the parents!
PERSONAL NOTE: This story reminds me of something that happened to one of my daughters best friends. She and her husband went to the doctor after their baby was born and the Ob/Gyn gave them the okay to start having relations again in six weeks. The wife was elated, but the husband looked at the Doctor and said, “I need more time!” True story!!!