Bernie Madoff has appealed to Donald Trump to reduce his 150-year prison sentence for running the world's largest Ponzi scheme.

- As an incentive he offered Trump a great deal on some Stock in the Acme Dynamite Company.


Even liberal CNN and MSNBC seem to agree that Robert Mueller’s testimony was disastrous for Dems hoping for criminal dirt on President Trump.

- Joy Behar was so devastated she almost couldn’t speak. Remember, I said “almost”.

- Rachel Maddow was so upset she had tears in her eyes and you could actually see her Adams Apple trembling.


Michael Moore tweeted that not only did Mueller fail to “deliver the goods” but he “sucked the life out of his report”.

- And then he ate a large pizza and a side of fries.


A study by US Trust found that Millennials - now in their 20’s and 30’s - believe “Old” starts at 59. But Baby Boomers - say you’re not “Old” until you’re 73.

- And remember what Groucho Marx said - or maybe it was Joe Biden - “You’re only as old as the woman you feel”.


A “Flasher” in Massachusetts got more than he bargained for when a female jogger he exposed himself to ran after him and wrestled him to the ground.

- Sounds like somebody wasn’t that impressed with what she saw.


Researchers at the University of Alabama claim that eating your last meal of the day at 2 in the afternoon may help you lose weight.

- There’s even a name for Dinner at 2 in the afternoon… It’s called “Lunch”.


NE Patriots QB Tom Brady hinted that he may become a fashion designer.

- He’ll design shirts with Shoulder Pads while Colin Kaepernick will provide the Knee Pads.


A new survey found that 4 in 10 people say the way they’ve lived their lives has left them with some regrets.

- Regrets? I’ve had a few. But then again… too few to mention.


Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!