Tens of thousands of women signed up on Facebook to display massive cleavage Monday, as part of “Boobquake Day.” They were out to disprove an Iranian cleric’s claim that immodestly dressed women cause earthquakes. But Monday afternoon, a strong 6.9 earthquake struck off the coast of Taiwan. A Boobquake organizer downplayed the quake, saying it “is not statistically significant, but if similar magnitude quakes occur, then we might start worshipping the power of immodesty.”
- Coincidence? A 4.3 earthquake struck just outside the Dancing with the Stars studio after Pamela Anderson danced last night.
- Wouldn’t “Boobquake Day” be better served on the Boob Tube than on Facebook?
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Speaking of “Boobs” In the News…
The famous “HOLLYWOOD” sign overlooking L.A. has been saved, thanks to Hugh Hefner. Preservationists were trying to buy the land next to it to keep developers from building expensive houses that would have blocked it from view. They managed to raise the needed $12.5 million, thanks to a final donation of $900,000 from Hefner.
- Hefner wasn’t available for further comment because he had to leave to attend a “Boobquake Day” celebration.
- Hugh kicked in the first $899,999.90. The other 10 cents came out of his new girlfriend’s weekly allowance.
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The Straight Poop from Down Under…
Australian scientists have discovered that whale poop is 10 million times more efficient than seawater in yielding high iron content. That makes it the perfect fertilizer for blooms of phytoplankton that absorbs sunlight and carbon dioxide and releases oxygen. So they say if we want to prevent global warming, we must insure that there are plenty of well-fed whales doing plenty of pooping.
- Additional fact: Whales are the second best providers of fertilizer in the world - just “behind” politicians.
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And What Better Way to “Wrap Up” That Story…
On this day in 1965, R.C. Duncan received a patent for Pampers disposable diapers.
- Just like Cracker Jacks, there’s a “surprise” in every package!
- Baby Boomers everywhere will be celebrating by walking around their homes with nothing on but their Depends.
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On the Local Front…
Happy Birthday to Detroit’s own Casey Kasem who turns 78 today. We understand Casey wanted to send out a “Long Distance Dedication” to himself, but at 78 he can’t go long distances anymore. (drum rim shot please)
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And Last But Certainly Not Least…
Hey, Hey Hockeytown! GO WINGS! Bring home a Game 7 win against those wily Coyotes tonight!