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Joe Biden has told campaign staffers that he’s worried his habit of making gaffes on the campaign trail will cost him the election.

- This is why Elizabeth Warren always speaks in Smoke Signals. Her mistakes just disappear into thin air.

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Today is National Creamsicle Day!

- It takes me back to my childhood days… Little did I know then, that they were not only putting a big smile on my face but a ton of cholesterol in my arteries.

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Ratings for Sunday night’s “Teen Choice Awards” fell by 28% from last year to an all time low.

- Makes sense… Jeffrey Epstein was “unavailable” to tune in at the time, so the only one watching was R. Kelly.

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Lucky Charms is selling bags of “Just Marshmallows” for two bucks which - unlike the originals - are “Bigger and Puffier”.

- Just like You’ll be if you eat ‘em.

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Caitlyn Jenner sent his/her daughter Kylie a 22nd Birthday wish on Instagram - but mistakenly posted a photo of himself/herself with daughter KENDALL Jenner instead.

- So I’m not the only one who can’t tell one Kardashian girl from the others. Except for Kim… BUTT that’s another story. I can recognize her coming or going.

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Mike Tyson - who recently opened a “Cannabis Vacation Resort” says he smokes $40,000 worth of Pot every month.

- He says the money comes out of a special fund he “ear marked” for partying.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

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