"March Madness" officially gets underway today.

- On the Democrat Calendar it follows "Furious February" and "Trump-is-a-Jerk January".


Former President Obama released his bracket for the NCAA Championship Series... picking UNC as the big winner, but President Trump declined to release his picks.  

- But worry not... Rachel Maddow will release Trump's Bracket LIVE tonight at 9pm. It'll be his bracket from 2005, but still.  


President Trump released his long-anticipated budget this morning, which calls for a defunding of NPR. 

- I hope he realizes this means NPR is going to start featuring shows that criticize everything he does. Oh, wait... 

He's also proposed cutting funds to Public Television which produces shows including "Sesame Street". 

- Bert & Ernie were unavailable for comment as they were attending a "Dressed in Green & Gay On St. Patrick's Day!" Parade.  


One of the tech guru's at Google says that by 2029 we will all have computers in our brains that will a make us smarter and sexier. 

- I don't want a computer in my brain... I just want a way to remember where I put the TV remote control. 

- So basically you'll end up calling an IT guy in India to say "My wife is running slow and I can't get her to download dinner". 


A German study found that 97% of people who view the Mona Lisa painting believe she looks "Happy". 

- The other 3% thought it was a profile picture they'd seen on match.com. 


Gwyneth Paltrow recently took to her website "Goop" to tell women to burn their bras because they could "carry negative energy and memories of your failed relationships". 

- It may sound weird, but it still sounds better than what Lorena Bobbitt did. 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!