President Obama announced a series of steps that will make it easier for former prisoners to get jobs after their release. 

- Good news Kwame! You should have no problem getting a job as a Walmart Greeter when you get sprung in 2037 at the age of 67! 


Carly Fiorina slammed the women on The View for criticizing her smile at the GOP debate. 

- Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar went ballistic, using expletives and storming off the set. No wait... that was during a segment on Pumpkin Pie recipes. 


Polls show that young women are "not into" Hillary Clinton. 

- Bill doesn't long as young women are still into HIM. 


Pope Francis has scheduled a trip to Mexico in February. 

- If he really wants to reach Mexican people, he should come back to the United States.


The new Star Wars movie doesn't open until December 18th, but AMC Theaters have already announced that movie-goers can wear costumes, but they have to turn off their Light Sabers during the film. 

- The same thing happened at the opening of "Debbie Does Dallas". 


A study out of Sweden shows that two Diet or Regular soda pops a day can increase Mens' risk of heart failure by 25%. 

- The announcement caused a lot of men to take a Big Gulp. 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!