U of M Concussion Controversy Continues - Statement from AD released at 12:10 AM said QB Shane Morris suffered a "mild concussion".  Nobody saw anything. Bizarre. Maybe they should hire the Secret Service to protect the players...

Then again, maybe not...

After Secret Service members themselves reported more than 1000 instances of "security lapses", a new report claims the Secret Service is not capable of protecting the President and his family. 

- Not true! They stopped that guy who jumped the fence, ran across the lawn, walked in the unlocked front door of the White House and made it all the way to the East Room on the second floor before he hurt ANYBODY! 


Hillary Clinton told reporters that she won't discuss her granddaughter, Charlotte. 

- Same thing she said about Benghazi. 

- Meanwhile Bill can't stop talking about the baby... And has put himself in charge of finding the perfect nanny. 


Pope Francis told followers that "a nation that doesn't take care of its elderly is a nation without a future." 

- Techinically, it's the "elderly" who don't have much of a future. 


A Liberian newspaper is standing by it's claim the U.S. manufactured Ebola. 

- This story would be a lot more credible if we actually manufactured things here in the U.S. 

- Obviously the fact-checkers didn't see the "Made in China" stickers on the bottoms of all the patients. 


Beyonce made big news by switching her hairstyle to include bangs. 

- She's trying for that always popular "Mamie Eisenhower Look". 


A Delaware man was killed while crossing the street to get to a funeral home. 

- I believe that's known as "cutting out the middleman". 

- On the bright side, he was headed to a visitation, so he was already dressed in a really nice suit. 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!