I think the above quote is perfect. To all of our Veteran's...Thank You!

*****

The Post Office confirmed that their employee database was breached. 

- Hackers were able to get postal workers names, social security numbers, and the names of the most feared dogs on every block in America. 

- Experts warn this could happen to Fed-Ex employees too...but the hackers will get the information much quicker...like overnight. 

*****

Rush Limbaugh is threatening to sue the Democratic National Committee for defamation. 

- The head of the DNC said, "Oh yeah? Well.......Ditto!" 

*****

An employee at a North Carolina Wal-Mart was caught on surveillance cameras using deodorant sticks and returning them to store shelves. 

- The man started sweating profusely when confronted...but still smelled like a Cool Ocean Breeze. 

*****

A New York Grandmother celebrated her 100th Birthday by going skydiving. 

- Amazingly, her boobs hit the ground before she even pulled the rip cord. 

- And to think most people are just happy to make it onto the Smucker's Jar. 

*****

A court ruled that Oscar Pistorius cannot get home surveillance because he could easily detach the leg that his monitoring bracelet is on. 

- Why don't they just put it on his other leg...no, wait...

- Besides, letting him stay at home could put dozens of potential "intruders" in danger of being shot.  

*****

Prince William and Kate Middleton are visiting New York next month to announce their new wild life charity.

- Meanwhile Prince Harry will visit Las Vegas next month to get drunk with a bunch of hot hookers. 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday! 

-Dick