Soon you can not only expect your doctor to check your blood pressure, but ask about your sex life.  A provision in Obamacare gives financial incentives to doctors to ask invasive questions including, “Are you sexually active? With how many partners? And are any of them same-sex partners?”, and then provide the info to the Feds. 

 - Doctors should take your BP before the sex questions if they want an accurate reading. 

 - It’s gonna be weird when your podiatrist asks who you’re sleeping while examining your bunions. 

 *****

There is one question not allowed to be asked by your physician under Obamacare: “Do you own a firearm”. 

 - So Doctors can give you shots, but they can’t ask if you’ve fired any of your own. 

 *****

Microbiologists at GOJO Industries say that the hand soap in 25% of the public restrooms they tested was as infected with bacteria as the toilet water. 

 - Men have known this for years which is why 25% of them never wash their hands after going to the bathroom! 

*****

Apparently a lot of people are talking about how humble Pope Francis is for driving a 1984 Renault car. 

- A 1984 Renault that’s still running? It’s a Miracle!  

*****

Justin Bieber posted a photo of himself holding a copy of the “Man of Steel: Batman vs. Superman” script, sparking internet outrage that he may play “Robin”. 

 - I think when most people think “Dynamic Duo” they think Ben Affleck and Justin Bieber. 

 - In a related story, Miley Cyrus will be the next Bond girl in the upcoming, “On Her Majesty’s Secret Twerking”. 

*****

Peyton Manning is upset that Denver pot dispensaries are selling a strain of marijana named after him. They claim it’s good for nausea. 

- On the flip side, the “Arron Hernandez” strain will most likely kill you. 

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday! And don’t forget to check my latest Podcast (#93) up now on the Homepage! 

-Dick  

 

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