Charlie Marcuse, The “Singing Hot Dog Man” from Comerica Park has been let-go for allegedly discouraging people from putting ketchup instead of mustard on the dogs he sells as a vendor. (I had him on my show many times!) Charlie is a “Mustard Man” but after 15 years the Sports Service Union has finally put it’s foot down on his public displays of condiment preferences.  

- So now he’ll be singing for his supper instead of yours

- Apparently after receiving three complaints, the managment said, “You’re Out!”.

- Charlie is seeking Asylum in France…chanting “French’s Mustard!” as he was led out of Comerica Park. 


Four NFL “Centers” have signed on to promote an alternative to toilet paper. The new pre-moistend bathroom wipes are called “One Wipe Charlies” and will be targeted directly at men.  

- The Quarterbacks are behind the Centers 100%.


The Vatican has opened the door to the possibility of letting priests get married.  

- There will be limits: The happy couple will only be allowed to register at “Lord & Taylor”. 

- Just like any other husband, a preist will have to make sure he doesn’t come home with lipstick on his collar. 


The U.S. Anti-Doping Agency banned an 80-year-old weightlifter for 2 years. 

- Apparently they consider Metamucil a Performing Enhancing Drug.

- The guy is 80 years old so a 2-year suspension basically means he’s been banned for life.


A new report says the White House is infested with vermin. This time cockroaches are the problem, but in the past they’ve also dealt with mice and rats.

- Of course that’s just when they invited members of Congress to a State Dinner.


Elton John said that despite being the godmother to his two young sons, Lady Gaga is in “a very dangerous place” and won’t return his phone calls.

- Turns out she accidentally turned off her phone when she went to the butcher shop to try on some dresses.


Billboard’s Women in Music Awards has named Pink “Women of the Year”. 

- They awarded the “Pole Dancer of the Year” to Miley Cyrus.


Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!