At last night’s 2013 Billboard Music Awards, the big winner with 8 trophies was Taylor Swift. But Justin Bieber won three awards, performed twice and was booed by the crowd one time. 

- Only once?

Justin was dressed in leather pants with a crotch that came halfway down his thighs.

- In prior days he had a babysitter for his pet monkey during performances. Apparently now he keeps his monkey in his pants. 


54-year-old Madonna accepted the “Best Touring Artist” Award, clad in fishnet thigh highs, black leather and chains. 

- Don’t you just love it when stars age gracefully? 


In July, a bar in Brooklyn is hosting a “Smallest Penis in Brooklyn” contest.  

- At last year’s contest John Wayne Bobitt and Anthony Weiner tied for first. 


As OJ continues to fight for a new trial in his armed robbery and kidnapping case, a prison insider told the National Enquirer that “The Juice” is still a chick magnet. The unidentifed source said OJ receives thousands of dollars from women for him to spend in the prison commisary, and who will “wait for him” until he gets out. 

- Apparently these are young women who don’t know about that “other trial” he had back in the ‘90’s. 

- Why not hook him up with Jodi Arias? He’s looking for a girlfriend and she’s looking to die. 


The toilet paper shortage in Venezuela continues. 

- It’s so bad, the government has made it illegal to eat at Taco Bell. 

- Why not just use Bounty Paper Towels? They’re the “Quicker-Picker-Upper” and you can “Select-a-Size”. 


Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday! And don’t forget to check out my latest Podcast (#79) up now on the homepage!