CBS is doing so well, they’re cancelling some of their hit TV shows. This week they announced that they’re cancelling long-running hits including “Cold Case” and “The New Adventures of Old Christine”. Execs say they think they can replace them with new shows that will get even better ratings…
- Like “CSI: Flatrock”, “CSI: Ypsilanti” and “CSI: Sterling Heights”.
NBC is also making changes… cancelling the original “Law & Order” after 20 years. Don’t panic, though. They’ve renewed “Law & Order: SVU”…
- The network says it will make history by producing a show aimed at women-only called “Law & Order: PMS”.
- In an other historic move, the network has decided to run the new show only once a month.
- NBC believes they’ll not only retain existing viewers, but gain viewers who are retaining water.
Move over Mom… Researchers at Eastern Virginia Medical School has discovered that about 10% of new fathers experience postpartum depression when a new child is born – possibly because of loss of sleep and stress on their relationship with their wives.
- The percentage of postpartum dads is much higher when they realize the baby doesn’t look anything like them – but looks a lot like the next door neighbor.
When President Obama speaks at an upcoming high school graduation in Kalamazoo he plans on shaking the hands of each and every graduate. There is a catch, though. Each Senior must provide the Secret Service with their dates of birth, Social Security numbers and proof of their citizenship status.
- The class clown replied, “I’ll show Obama my birth certificate if he’ll show me his”.
- Grads can also bypass the security check by just showing a snapshot proving they know infamous White House party crashers Michaele and Tareq Salahi.
A nationwide survey of men over 40 suggest that taking Viagra, Cialis and other similar E.D. drugs could double a man’s risk of hearing impairment…
- Most men surveyed said, “and the downside is???”
- When asked about this story, Big Al replied, “I’m only going to take Viagra until I need hearing aids”
- Turns out Hugh Hefner hasn’t heard a word one of his girlfriends has said in the last 10 years.
A new university study found that animals are surprisingly similar to human males. Researchers discovered that male antelopes will “lie” to females by pretending there are Lions nearby in order to keep them from wandering off and having sex with other male antelopes. The study was conducted at our own MSU!
- The male antelopes were also known to light couches on fire after big football games. (Just kidding…)
- The study further showed that gay male antelopes liked to take the females shopping and really listened to them when they talked about their boyfriend troubles.
Actor Nicholas Cage has done it again… He told Britain’s “The Sun” newspaper that he will only eat animals that have sex in a “dignified” way. Among them, fish and chicken, creatures he believes pro-create in a respectable fashion.
- You know, like goldfish… who do it in a goldfish bowl.
British Petroleum has given the go-ahead to try a new machine designed to help clean up the disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. The device can filter oil sludge out of about 210,100 gallons of water a day and was invented by actor Kevin Costner’s brother…
- He says he got the idea for helping with oceanic disasters after seeing his brother’s movie, “Waterworld”.
- Kevin is said to have told his brother, “If you build it, the oil will come”.
Have you had the “Double Down” from KFC yet? It’s a sandwich consisting of bacon and cheese nestled inside two fried chicken breasts instead of a bun. At 540 calories and 32 grams of fat, it’s KFC’s hottest seller yet. It was supposed to be a limited-time menu item… but it’s proven so popular, KFC has decided to keep it on the menu indefinitely…
- They’res a new sign outside each restaurant reading: “10 Million Served. 9 Million Died!”
- Why would KFC want to promote something that will help their customers, “Kick the Bucket”?