Unknown-53.jpeg

NASA has released s short list of female astronauts who could become the first woman to walk on the moon.

- It’ll be a Small Step for Man… and a Giant Leap for High Heels.

*****

Steven Spielberg released the cast photo from his remake of “West Side Story”.

- In his version, thousands of illegal immigrants run across the border singing “I Like To Be In America!”

- And in keeping with Diversity, Tony falls in love with a girl named Maria who identifies as a guy named Manuel.

*****

The Broadway play “Hillary & Clinton” which producers say “Takes place in an alternate universe and centers on a woman named Hillary Clinton who is running for President in 2008” is closing early do to low tickets sales.

- Apparently people didn’t want to see a play where they already knew the ending.

*****

A Fox News poll has Bernie Sanders leading President Trump by nine points with likely voters.

- Bernie thanked his supporters for taking time out from watching “Matlock” to vote in the survey.

*****

Costco is selling a giant pink-frosted doughnut that weighs almost two pounds, but unfortunately it’s only available in Australia.

- It figures that something with about a million calories would show up “Down Under”.

*****

A Florida man was arrested after he stripped naked inside a McDonald’s and performed some kind of strange dance.

- He’s accused of showing off his “All-Beef Patties”.

- Turns out the man was arrested once before at Burger King for “Holding the Pickle”.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick

Comment