Ray Tomlinson, the inventor of email has died at the age of 74. 

- Friends say he was loved by all...except for the U.S. Postal Service. 

- If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have had the chance to send money to a super nice guy in Nigeria. 

*****

Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders interrupted and criticized each other repeatedly during last nights Democrat debate in Flint. 

- It was basically like watching an old married couple waiting in line for a early bird dinner at Denny's. 

*****

Arnold Schwarzenegger has endorsed John Kasich for President calling him "a real life action hero". 

- But if Kasich doesn't pick up some more delegates he's going to end up Terminating his campaign. 

- The endorsement will help Kasich lock in the all important "Housekeepers Who Have Slept With Their Married Bosses" vote. 

*****

The big rumor in show biz is that Luke Skywalker will come out as gay in the next Star Wars movie. 

- This means he'll be joining the dark side every fall because he wouldn't be caught dead wearing white after Labor Day. 

- The movie is tentatively called: Star Wars: The Force Accessorizes! 

*****

North Korea has issued a new threat of a pre-emptive nuclear strike against the U.S. and South Korea. 

- Apparently Kim Jong Un has run out of relatives to execute. 

*****

A real life fight broke out at a Civil War reenactment at Gettysburg on Saturday. 

- Organizers were quick to Address the issue. 

- And in a case of history repeating itself, the Union actor won the fight with the Confederate guy. 

*****

Caitlyn Jenner slammed Hillary Clinton saying she cares only about herself and "doesn't care about women at all". 

- I remember back in 2004 when Bruce Jenner said Obama "doesn't care about men at all". 

*****

RIP... Nancy Reagan. 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick