OCTOBER 13, 2016

Bob Dylan has won the 2016 Nobel Prize in Literature for his poetic lyrics, becoming the first musician to win the Prize since it was first awarded in 1901. 

- A reporter immediately asked Dylan "How Does It Feeeeel?"

- Bob replied something...but nobody could understand what he was saying. 

*****

According to new reports, the "vast majority" of FBI and DOJ  employees who investigated the Hillary Clinton email scandal believed she should have been indicted and claim the decision not to charge her came straight from the White House. 

-  Wow... What a surprise. What's next? We're gonna find out Rock Hudson was gay???

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Donald Trump is threatening to sue the NY Times over an article that claims he groped four more women - charges Trump calls "complete fabrication".  

- The New York Times is standing by the story, saying they will continue to publish "All The News That's Fit To Make Sure Hillary Get's Elected".

*****

An online Halloween Costume company is being crizitcized for selling a "Kim Kardashian Robbery Victim" Costume. 

- It may be tacky, but think of all the candy you could put in the... "Baggage Compartment". 

*****

Singer Rod Stewart was Knighted by Prince William during a ceremony at Buckingham Palace. 

- The evening was capped off when the Queen jumped off her throne and danced around singing, "If you want my body...and you think I'm sexy... C'mon sugar, let me know!"

*****

Scientist are working on a new "Taste Buddy" fork that uses electrical impulses to alter taste buds so foods like vegetables would taste like chocolate. 

- Think how excited the kids will be on Easter morning to wake up to a basket filled with Broccoli Bunnies and Lima Beans!

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NOTE: Amid the "Creepy Clown" scare, Detroit is trying to put a Happy Face back on Clowns by bringing back our own Bozo! 86 year old Art Cervi will come out of retirement to don his red hair and big shoes at the Hockeytown Cafe at 12:30 today as part of RetroRama Classic Collectibles Con. Art is a longtime friend of mine and proves that all Clowns aren't Bozos... even though he is!

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!

-Dick