Every year on this day, I think back to something my dear, departed friend Charlie Krutsch used to say...
"Hurray! Hurray! The First of May! Outdoor... 'Romancing' Starts Today!"
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Toronto Mayor Rob Ford has entered a drug and alcohol rehab facility after a video surfaced reportedly showing him smoking crack in his sister's basement last Saturday. Ford says he thinks he has a substance abuse problem.
- Gee...ya think?
- From now on, all his campaign speeches will start with, "Hi. My name is Rob..."
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Rumors are swirling that Oprah is interesting in buying the LA Clipper's.
- And she's going to buy everyone in the audience of her next TV show a Basketball Team of their own!
- Donald Sterling wouldn't mind her owning the team...as long as she doesn't attend any of the games.
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German Chancellor Angela Merkel arrives in America today and will spend tomorrow with President Obama at the White House.
- Her voice is going to be so much clearer when she's secretly audio taped in the Oval Office instead of over the phone!
- Michele Obama will serve a special German Lunch for Ms. Merkel consisting of a a Bratwurst made out of tofu and sunflower seeds.
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A Harris Interactive Poll found that Frenchmen think sex is the key to happiness, and Frenchwomen say it's chocolate.
- Experts reminded couples to use protection, or they could end up with a Baby Ruth.
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Instagram pulled down photos of Rihanna because they say they showed too much skin.
- She should have put them on "Stripagram" where they belong.
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Following their arraignment at a Connecticut courthouse over a domestic dispute, Paul Simon and Edie Brickell denied rumors that their marriage is in trouble.
- As proof, Paul said, "I can still call her Betty...and she can still call me Al". (The video of that song with Chevy Chase is still a classic.)
- The couple took some romantic selfies, but it'll take about a week for the Kodachrome pics to be developed.
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A private Australian firm claims they've found the wreckage of the missing Malaysian Plane...7000 miles away from the current search area.
- Sounds like somebody used "Mapquest"!
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Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!
-Dick