North Korea's new luxury ski resort has officially opened.
- It's like a regular ski resort except instead of a "bunny hill" it has a "doggy hill" and you don't ski down it, you eat it.
- Kim Jong Un even put in a special chair lift for family members that takes them to the top of the mountain and drops them off the other side.
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Jim Caldwell is the Lions new Head Coach. They say he works particularly well with Quarterbacks. Let's hope he works equally as well with Receivers!
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Robert Martinage, the No. 2 official at the U.S. Navy, was forced to resign because of inappropriate conduct towards females in his office.
- His lawyers claim he was borrowing a page from the Marines and was simply, "Looking For a Few Good Women".
- Apparently when he said, "All Hands on Deck!" he was referring to a cute Midshipman named Cindy Deck.
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Michelle Obama turns 50 this week and she says she wouldn't rule out Botox or plastic surgery down the road.
- She's still trying to get on the Obamacare website to find out if facelifts and tummy tucks are covered.
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The Congressional Budget Office says that between 2006 and 2011, Medicaid doled out $172 Million for Penis Pumps.
- They keep "artificially inflating" the budget to screw the country so I guess this makes sense.
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Jerry Seinfeld and Jason Alexander were seen exiting the New York diner made famous in their hit show Seinfeld. Some say it's a sign of a possible reunion show.
- Jerry doesn't need the money, but maybe George's bank account is suffering from "shrinkage".
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Have a great day and I'll see you back here tomorrow!
-Dick