Anthony Weiner was involved in a minor car crash in NYC.
- Apparently he was looking at his GPS at the time…his Global Penis Satellite.
*****
It’s now being reported that some NSA employees spied on their love interests.
- That’s why Anthony Weiner took so many pictures of his penis.
*****
Miley “Hannah Montana” Cyrus is still taking heat for her over-the-top sexually charged performance at Sunday Night’s MTV Video Awards. Even while the performance was going on she broke the record for the most tweets about a celebrity per minute at 306,000.
- Anthony Weiner still holds the record of most tweets sent by a pervert per minute at 206,000.
- Walt Disney was spinning so fast in his grave people thought it was a new ride.
*****
Secretary of State John Kerry declared that it’s “undeniable” that Syria has chemical weapons.
- His first clue came when he saw the cannisters marked “Chemical Weapons” lying around the scene of the attack.
*****
Canadians are the most active Facebook users in the world.
- It’s a nice break from watching hockey.
- It’s a nice break from drinking beer.
*****
A man in Colorado wants marijuana to be classified as a vegetable.
- Well that’s one way to get your teenagers to eat healthy!
- Ironically, the guy pushing the idea has smoked so much marijuana he actually is a vegetable.
*****
Taylor Swift’s childhood home in Reading, PA is for sale.
- It comes with the teeter-totter she sat on when she broke up with her pre-school boyfriend.
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!
-Dick