Some pundits believe Marco Rubio’s awkward pause for a drink of water during his State of the Union rebuttal could impact his future political aspirations. 

- Apparently the Government doesn’t like people drinking…unless it the Kool-Aid they’re handing out. 

- Stopping to drink during speeches never hurt Ted Kennedy’s career! 

*****

Stanford University geneticist Dr. Gerald Crabtree says he believes that the human race is slowly becoming dumber and dumber. 

- But with every new reality show…we’re getting dumber faster and faster.

- I believe they already made a documentary about this starring Jim Carey and Jeff Daniels.

- Dr. Crabtree says the “dumbest person on the planet” could possibly be born the day Kim Kardashian gives birth to Kanye West’s baby.  

***** 

Office Max and Office Depot are reportedly planning to merge. 

- There’s only one thing that could make those two companies join together: Staples. 

*****

A Nestle spokesman said that the complaint of glass in their Lean Cuisine dinners is unusual because their factories have a “no glass” policy. 

- But they did note that “glass is very low in calories and has no sat fat!”

- On the bright side, having a slow bleed from a piece of glass in your digestive system really speeds up weight loss! 

- This explains why “Windex” is listed as an ingredient in the sauce on their glazed chicken. 

*****

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are starting their own wine business. 

- I guess since their attempts at world peace failed, they decided to just get drunk and forget about it. 

- In related news, Manti Te’o and his imaginary dead girlfriend are opening their own dating website. 

***** 

Rhianna debuted her first fashion line, but critics called her clothes “hideous” and like a “horror show”. 

- Hey…at least she’s getting hit by the critics and not Chris Brown. 

***** 

NOTE: Don’t forget to remember that the 26th annual Salvation Army Bed & Bread Club Radiothon is coming up THIS FRIDAY, Feb 22nd, from 6am to 10pm. I’ll be back behind the mic for the entire 16 hour broadcast which will air and be streamed live from the Oakland Mall on 760 WJR.

As many of you know, this Radiothon is the only fundraiser for the Bed & Bread Program which feeds over 5000 men, women & children every day, 365 days a year. It also provides shelter for over 400 Metro-Detroiters every night of the year. Your donation of $10 a month - that’s just $120 a year - FEEDS ONE PERSON FOR ENTIRE YEAR! You can donate right now by going to salmich.org or calling 1-248-528-0760. 

Every penny raised goes right to those who need it the most. 

Thanks so much for your support and I hope you’ll stop by the Oakland Mall, or tune in at 760 WJR. You can also watch it all unfold as it’s streamed live on WJR, plus Channels 2, 4, & 7. 

-Dick

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