For the first time ever, Hollywood heavy hitters Meryl Streep and Tom Hanks will appear in a film together.

- No word yet on which accent Meryl will use. 

- The movie is tentatively being called "Sleepless In Madison County". 


The latest issue of the ISIS months magazine offers up relationship advice warning women not to talk badly about their husbands or "co-wives" in public because Allah doesn't like it. 

- Look for next months cover story: "Spice Up Your Sex Life With A Sexy To-Die-For Suicide Vest!"


Meanwhile military sources says ISIS has created a children's book that explains terrorism and recruits kids to the cause. 

- It's called "Curious George Joins the Jihad!".


Despite having her fashion line dropped by major retailers like Nordstrom, Ivanka Trump has seen a dramatic spike in sales of her clothes and shoes. 

- In a related story, sales of "The Hillary Clinton Pantsuit Collection" are on the decline. 


Courtney Love put up a Facebook post claiming that Marlon Brando is her Grandfather! Why?  Because he was living in the same building as her Grandmother when her mother was conceived. 

- That sound you hear is blowing up. 


Former President Obama has reportedly told friends that his relationship with Donald Trump is "unraveling". 

- Who among us hasn't lost a friend when we found out they were tapping our phone???


Scientist have announced that it's possible for Potatoes to grow on Mars. 

- Tom Cruise was like, "Duh... What do you think I eat when I visit my Scientology Time-Share Vacation Home there???".

- Apparently they just came across some old photos sent back by Spud-nik. 


Spend time tidying up clutter before guests arrive? Don't. A new study shows a messy house can make visitors feel better about their own less-than-perfect homes. 

- Unless, of course that "guest" is your mother-in-law, in which case you are screwed no matter what. 


Breaking news... J-Lo is dating A-Rod. 

- The big question now is what do we call them? J-Rod? A-Lo? 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!