Brian Williams announced that he's taking some time off to regroup in the wake of the "I was in a helicopter that was hit by an RPG" scandal. 

- Williams career is going down like the Titantic... which he was on, by the way. 

- If he ends up getting fired, there will be a bright side. It will give him plenty of time to work on his book, "Lone Survivor: How I Made It Out Of The Hindenburg Alive". 


Madonna kicked off the 2015 Grammys last night with a performance of her new single. 

- The song is a remake of her old hit "Vogue" but this time it's called "AARP Magazine". 

Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett sang a duet of the classic "Cheek to Cheek". 

- You know that's the one about Kim Kardashian putting on her underwear. 


The new Spongebob Squarepants movie was #1 at the box office over the weekend, knocking American Sniper out of the top spot. 

- I've got one word for Spongebob... DUCK! 


No word yet on who will replace Rosie O'Donnell after her decision the leave "The View". 

- How about Brian Williams? He could enthrall the girls on The View with all of his war stories. 


A new book claims that Charles Manson's new bride married him so she can keep his corpse when he dies. 

- Could those two crazy kids be anymore in love???


A study by Medicine Net found that having spontaneous sex can increase your lifespan. 

- If this is true, Charlie Sheen is gonna live to be 200 years old. 

- But if you have spontaneous sex with Lindsay Lohan you're gonna need some antibiotics. 


A German cannibal received 300 offers after placing an ad for a volunteer who wanted to be killed and eaten. 

- Those who responded included a Mr. Frank N. Beans, H. Amburger, and a Miss Patty Melt. 

- Let's just hope this guy's not on Facebook...I don't want to see a picture of who he had for dinner last night. 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here tomorrow!