Charlie Sheen says he is “genuinely interested” in being a judge on American Idol.
- And most of America is “genuinely interested” in Charlie Sheen just going away.
The world’s heaviest woman said she lost nearly 100 pounds by making love seven times a day.
- Her husband, who’s in the hospital suffering from weight loss and extreme exhaustion, says his wife is a “real looker” now!
- And to think she used to think of “The Big O” as a box of Oreo Cookies.
For the first time in the history of IQ testing, psychologists have found that females are smarter than males.
- They could have saved a lot of money on research by just asking their wives!
On this day in 1936 the first Oscar Mayer Wienermobile rolled out of a body shop in Chicago.
- To celebrate, the local 7-Eleven threw a hot dog on the roller… and that hot dog is still going around today.
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday! And don’t forget to check out Podcast #50 with Tom Ryan joining us at the dining room table! Find it on the homepage or iTunes now!
-Dick
Charlie Sheen nearly ruined my weekend by shutting down his Twitter account, but now comes word that he was quite the Tweeter in his day. Bree Olson, his former porn star girlfriend told the press that Charlie used to “tweet” while they were having sex.
- Bree added that he really wasn’t all that good of a “multi-tasker”.
- He would have posted it on facebook but his “laptop” was already taken.
During a speech in Virginia, President Obama told people that were getting sick from the heat, to seek attention from paralegals. He meant to say “paramedics”.
- Why not cut out the middleman and go straight to the ambulance chasers?
- Somebody’s been spending too much time with Joe Biden!
President Obama made a major announcement on Monday. When asked by a bunch of Girl Scouts which of their famous cookies is his favorite he chose “Thin Mints”. He said Samoa’s were his second favorite.
-Donald Trump immediately demanded to see his Samoan Birth Certificate.
Fiat is making a car that has an on-board espresso maker.
- And you thought putting mascara on while driving was distracting.
- It’s getting great ratings from “Caffeine and Driver” Magazine.
- If you pour the espresso in your tank, it will actually give your car a jump start.
The Penn State Board of Trustees is meeting to decide what to do with a statue of former coach Joe Paterno.
- They’ve already agreed to shut the statue’s eyes.
- The sculpture is actually very realistic… it doesn’t talk either.
Stephen Covey, author of the best-selling book “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” died Monday at 79 from complications of a bike fall - even though he was wearing a helmet.
- Apparently his doctors had not read his follow-up book, “Seven Habits of Highly Effective Medical Personel”.
On this day in 1861 Congress authorized the first paper money to be issued.
- Now the Government is considering buying out Kinko’s so they can keep print more of it even faster!
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here on Wednesday! And FYI… Podcast #50 is up on the homepage! I talk with special guest Tom Ryan about the heydays of radio on Keener 13!
-Dick
Move over William and Kate… there’s a new Royal couple grabbing the headlines. North Korea’s Kim Jong Un has a girlfriend! Hyon-Song-wol is a previously married pop-star who had a string of hits including “Excellent Horse-like Lady”.
- It figures only somebody famous could snag a hottie like Kim Jong Un!
- Kim is apparently so smitten with her, he promised to never have her executed!
- They want the same things all young North Korean couples want: a nice house, a few kids and some food.
A lot of Americans, including politicians, are up in arms over the fact the official United States Team Blazers to be worn by the American Olympic Team were made in China.
- Hey, I’ll give a gold medal to anybody who can find a blazer in this country that wasn’t made in China.
- With all the sweating the athletes do, they’re going to end up with Olympic-Rings-Around-The-Collar!
- Interestingly, the jackets were made by the same 13-year-old girls who will compete as 16-year-olds on the Chinese Gymnastic Team.
There are already rumors flying about wild parties with sex and drugs among U.S. Olympians.
- So apparently Michael Phelps is already in town.
- Don’t think of it as “pot smoking”… think of it as practice for the torch lighting ceremony.
With word that J Lo and Steven Tyler are out as judges at American Idol, Aretha Franklin told the media she’s more than interested in the job.
- Producers of Idol are looking for a young audience, so if I were Aretha I wouldn’t E-X-P-E-C-T a call anytime soon.
Rielle Hunter’s tell-all book about her affair with John Edwards has only sold 6000 copies.
- Not surprising! What could she possibly tell that we didn’t already read about in the National Enquirer?
Russia is considering finally burying the body of Soviet leader Vladimir Lenin, which has been kept in a glass display case since his death in 1924.
- Moments after the announcement Windex stocks tumbled in the Russian market.
- It’s too bad Michael Jackson isn’t alive. He’d buy Lenin, fly him to the Neverland Ranch, and and put him in a curio cabinet.
- He’s been in a glass case just a year less than the display piece of Cherry Pie at a diner near my house.
On this day in 1439, to halt plague germs from spreading, kissing was outlawed in England.
- So people just crossed the English Channel where they were allowed to French Kiss.
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday! In the meantime, check out Podcast (#50) featuring Tom Ryan and our days at Keener 13 radio in the ‘60’s!
-Dick
Hard to believe, but today we air our 50th Podcast! To honor the occassion, Jackie and I welcome my original producer, on-air character voice talent and long time friend Tom Ryan to the table, for a flashback to my start in Detroit radio. 
I’m talking the days when Top 40 AM Radio ruled the airwaves and Keener 13, my home for three incredibly exciting years, was King of the Hill. From Swingin’ Sweeney to DJ’s Swingin’ their fists (honest!), we reminisce about a whole different time in radio - when it was about more than just playing songs back-to-back… it was about entertaining the audience - or at least trying to - and having the freedom to do so!
We talk about some of the earliest characters we did on my show (that still crack me up!). Plus, we explain just exactly how Tom went from being the station’s Switchboard Operator to my on-air voice guy.
Join us as we hit the rewind button to what truly were the Good Old Days!
Have a great weekend!
-Dick
Purtan Podcast #50 (32:11)
Thanks so much to all of you who sent me Birthday wishes thru Facebook, e-mail and here on the website! Your kind words really made my day!
I would love to respond to each one of you individually, but unfortunately my mouse has a virus and a guy in India told me to take it easy today. Besides… there’s a Hitler special coming on that I’ve only seen 357 times.
All in all, it was a great Birthday. (The only thing that would have made it better would have been a free cake from Bill Knapps but, hey, you can’t have your cake and free Slurpee at 7-Eleven too!)
Thanks again and here’s to a great year for us all!
-Dick