A Mastiff named Martha has been crowned the World’s Ugliest Dog of 2017.

- She celebrated in the traditional way... barking, wagging her tail and rubbing her butt across the carpet. (Personally I think she's kind of a looker!)

*****

Speaking of dogs... Kim Jong Un ghost-wrote an Op-Ed piece comparing Donald Trump to Hitler. 

- Well isn't that the Pot-Bellied-Dictator calling the Kettle black.

*****

A Broadway adaptation of George Orwell's "1984" is causing anti-Trump audience members to "faint, throw up and scream". 

- The last time a Broadway show had that effect was when Michael Moore starred in "Oh! Calcutta!"

*****

President Trump called out the New York Times - again - for being "Liars" and writing more "Fake News" when they claimed he doesn't understand the Senate's health care bill. 

- I don't think ANYONE understands the Senate's health care bill... including the Senate.  

*****

If cash-strapped Illinois doesn't approve a new budget by Friday, the State will suspend the sales of Powerball and Mega Millions lottery tix because they can't afford the payouts. 

- And just like that, millions of people's "Retirement Plans" may go out the window. 

*****

Long walks are known to improve moods and reduce anxiety, but the benefits are enhanced if the walks take place outdoors instead of in a gym, according to a new study out of Austria.

- So the Von Trapp kids wouldn't have looked nearly as happy escaping from Austria if they'd been singing "Climb Every Mountain" on a treadmill.  

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Thursday! 

-Dick