The Red Wings face the Tampa Bay Lightning in Game 7 of their series tonight in Tampa. A win will send them to the next round of the play offs... but it's going to be extra-challenging. The Wings will be without "go-to-guy" Niklas Kronwell, who was suspended for one game for "launching into a hit" against a Lightning forward. Game time: 7:30pm. GO WINGS!

***** 

A hot new trend in Japan called "Silver Porn" features "Adult Film Actresses" over the age of 65. 

- Among the most popular films: "Debbie Has No Recollection of Doing Dallas" & "Deep Vein Thrombosis". 

*****

Justin Bieber is being criticized for crashing a high school prom in California last Saturday night. 

- The news is just coming out now because everyone thought he was just an awkward girl that no one would dance with. 

*****

Apple has confirmed that wrist tattoos can cause the Apple Watch to malfunction, keeping tattooed wearers from using some apps and even making calls. 

- So your Tattoo may say "I Heart Mom"...but you can't call her to let her know. 

*****

Prince William and Kate Middleton sent pastries and coffee to fans waiting outside St. Mary's Hospital for the birth of their Royal baby. 

- So when Push comes to Shove, the Royals really do care about the commoners! 

*****

Two graduate students from Ohio have invented a device that can determine if motorists have used marijuana. 

- The technical name for it is: "A Bag Of Doritos". 

*****

New York City's Yellow Taxi's are installing a panic button that a driver can push is he's under attack. 

- Taxi Riders are lobbying for a panic button THEY can use when their sense of smell is under attack. 

*****

A Pennsylvania woman "relieved herself" on a cops leg while resisting arrest. 

- She fled on foot, and the police immediately issued an A-Pee-B. 

- Her lawyer plans to to with the "Over Active Bladder Defense". 

*****

Have a great day, GO WINGS, and I'll see you back here Thursday! 

-Dick