In the ongoing war on Global Warming, Federal researchers are attempting to breed sheep that give off less methane gas when they burp or break wind.
- It's actually a highly classified project known as: "Silent But Deadly".
- If only they'd had this technology before my former brother-in-law Joe married into the family.
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John Kerry say the U.S. is exploring alternative ways to kill off insurgents in Iraq.
- They'd send in a bunch of Sheep, but poison gas isn't allowed under the Geneva Convention.
- That's the great thing about death...so many options!
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Twenty girls, age 7 and younger were forced into marriage during a ceremony in India.
- The brides are already complaining about spending all day cooking for their husbands in their plastic "Little Tikes" kitchens.
- I hope their parents aren't expecting grandkids anytime soon.
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A pre-teen boy in France has finally admitted that he made-up a story about being kidnapped to get out of going to the dentist.
- It took hours, but the cops finally drilled the truth out of him.
- I'm guessing this kid was born without Wisdom teeth.
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At 3:30pm this afternoon, Governor Rick Snyder is expected to sign the "Breastfeeding Anti-Descrimination Act" making it legal for woman to nurse their babies in public.
- For full coverage of this story, just turn to any news channel on the Boob tube.
- The police are expecting a huge crowd in Lansing...not protestors, just a lot of creepy guys with cameras.
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The Government continues to try to force the owner of the NFL's Washington Redskins to change the team name, saying it's offensive.
- How about The Washington Redskin Potatoes? Nothin' offensive about that!
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Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!
-Dick