Russian officials inserted footage from the Opening Ceremonies rehearsal into the live Russian telecast so Vladimir Putin and his comrades wouldn't see the fact that only 4 of the 5 Olympic Rings actually lit up. 

four rings .jpeg

- They did it for Russian Pride...and to prevent Putin from killing the people in charge of the light show. 

*****

Twitter users were up in arms after the male half of an American figure skating duo wore a gun holster as part of his outfit saying it portrayed Americans as gun-toting thugs. Btw...The team was skating to the theme from "Skyfall"...a James Bond movie. 

- He was going to skate with a Martini but was afraid he'd spill it during his triple lutz.

*****

The USDA has recalled 8.7 million pounds of meat saying it came from "unhealthy or unsound animals", but they won't say what stores or restaurants ended up with the meat. 

- You'll know pretty quickly if you have lunch at a fast food restaurant today and afterward enjoy the Taco Bell "Experience".   

- An "Unsound" cow is described as one who is "Udderly depressed". 

*****

According to a new survey, one in four 26-year-olds live with their parents. 

- Or as the 26-year-olds like to tell their friends, they've allowed their parents to move in with them. 

*****

A streaker ran across the runway during New York's fashion week. 

- Fashionistas said they loved his "Bold, Nude Look" and proceeded to order thousands of dollars of nothing to put in stores this Spring. 

- Some of the models were so shocked they fainted and had to be revived with imitation smelling salts so they wouldn't retain any water. 

*****

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have moved up their wedding date. 

- Sounds to me like somebody got knocked up and doesn't want to have a baby out of wedlock...no, wait, they already did that.  

*****

Yankees third basemen Alex Rodriguez dropped his law suit against Major League Baseball and accepted his 162 game suspension. 

- He said that after giving it some thought, he's "pumped up" about having a little time off. No more "pumped up" than usual, but still pretty "pumped up". 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Tuesday! 

-Dick