CNN is reporting that Brian Williams will NOT be returning to the anchor desk when his 6 month suspension is up in August, but will remain employed by NBC in a different capacity. 

- No word on what his position will be...but I'm bettin' it won't be in the "Fact Checking" department. 

- They should have him host a show on MSNBC. That way if he lies again, only two people will know about it. 


President Obama refused to confirm whether or not Prince and Stevie Wonder played a private show at the White House last weekend. 

- How are we supposed to believe in "transparency in government" when they won't even admit that two guys played a concert at the White House? 

- Sounds like we're the ones getting' the old song and dance routine. 


Rachel Dolezal says there is no biological proof who her parents are, and that she's definitely NOT white. 

- I've got 3 words for her: DNA. 

- The only thing we know for sure is that on March 17th, she's Irish. Because on St. Patrick's Day...EVERYONE is Irish! 


A 103 year old British man married a 91 year old woman on Tuesday. 

- Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'? Yup...somebody got knocked up!  

- Luckily, they've already got plenty of diapers on hand. 


A judge in Japan has ruled that sleeping with a prostitute doesn't count as infidelity. He says that since money is exchanged, it's just a business deal, not "cheating". 

- And just like that Bill Clinton booked a dozen speaking gigs in Tokyo. 

- Married women all over Japan are calling for the Judge's gavel to be taken away. Surgically. 


Phil Collins bought a mansion in Florida that belonged to Jennifer Lopez. 

- His favorite part of the house is the built-in music Stu-Stu-Studio. 


The Treasury Department announced that the $10 bill will feature a woman's face starting in the year 2020, they just don't know which one yet. 

- Caitlyn Jenner seems like the obvious choice since you could use her to make change for a twenty. (Before you go looking in your purse or wallet, Alexander Hamilton is currently on the $10 bill). 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here with a brand new Podcast Friday!