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BRRRRRR… How cold is it???

It’s so cold the Kardashian sisters are wearing Underwear.

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According to a new law in Iran it’s now illegal to walk your dog in public or take it for a ride in the car.

- Apparently the dogs barking was covering up all the “Death to America” chants by the Ayatollahs.

- Let me get this straight… You can’t dress your Dog in a Burka (or is that a Barka??) and go outside anymore?

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Jeff Bezos’ is trying to find out how the racy text messages he sent to his girlfriend ended up in The National Enquirer. He’s convinced the leak was “politically motivated”.

- I’m thinking the leak came from his girlfriend and was motivated by “Something in His Pants”. (Like $140 Billion for starters).

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KFC is test marketing a new Fried Chicken & Cheetos Sandwich with a special Cheetos flavored Cheese Sauce.

- I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to mess up my diet by adding Cheetos to a perfectly healthy Fried Chicken Sandwich.

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A Democrat porn star is ending her long shot 2020 bid to “Make America F---ing Awesome Again” after her campaign failed to get off the ground.

- Because she failed to get out of bed to promote it.

- Her slogan “Hope & Change-for-a-Twenty You Can Believe In” just didn’t catch on.

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50 percent of Americans say they get in fights while playing Monopoly… compared with only 18 percent of people who play Scrabble.

- There’s a word for people who fight during Scrabble, but I can’t give it to you because I’m all out of vowels.

- Speaking of “Community Chest”… Madonna is said to be a big fan of Monopoly.

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In an effort to provide more fertilizer for State run farms, Kim Jong Un has ordered each resident of North Korea to hand over 3 tons of “human waste” each month.

- I say Lil Kim should have to go first. He looks like he’s carrying around 3 tons of something.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

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