A friend of Jeff Bezos' new girlfriend Lauren Sanchez says Mr. Amazon would be “stupid” to marry Sanchez… who’s been engaged four times, married once and cheated repeatedly.

- Sounds like Bezos traded the “Girl Next Door” for one who has “Been Around the Block”.

*****

A construction firm in Chicago is building an 800 foot high skyscraper made entirely of wood.

- The architects read a lot of books in preparation for the project. Unfortunately “The Three Little Pigs” wasn’t one of them.

*****

The wife of a furloughed Federal Worker won $100,000 in the Virginia lottery Saturday and says she plans to take her family to Disney World for a week.

- And if she thinks 100 grand is going get her a whole week in Disney World, she really IS living in Fantasyland.

*****

A tanker truck in Arizona overturned spilling 3500 gallons of melted chocolate onto the freeway.

- If only it had happened over the weekend they could have had a Hot Fudge Sunday on their hands.

*****

According to a new book, Eva Braun never had sex with HItler because she suffered from a rare gynecological condition that would have made it extremely painful.

- Maybe that’s why he was so mean.

*****

25 year old Rapper Cardi B made headlines by Tweeting a profanity-laced message that says the Government shutdown “scares her”.

- It “scares me” that a tweet by a 25 year old rapper is considered “news”.

*****

Students at THE Ohio State University can now get pizzas with just the touch of a button thanks to a new high-tech pizza ATM.

- It’s perfect for Buckeye Football players who get hungry waiting for the girl they hired to finish their term papers.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

1 Comment