President Trump tweeted that people who don't like him are suffering from "Trump Derangement Syndrome". 

- So exposure to  Trump will give you TDS.  Exposure to Stormy Daniels will give you an STD. 


The Brady Bunch home in California is on the market for $1.8 Million. It was purchased in 1973 for $61,000. 

- Forget about "Location, Location, Location!". It's all about "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" 

- The house is in a great neighborhood, plus you get free meat delivery from Sam the Butcher.


A friend of Matt Lauer's claims that Matt wants to get back on TV so badly, he's wiling to give up sex completely to make it happen. 

- I say whatever Matt does behind closed (and remotely locked) office doors is his own business. 


A 21 year old waitress at "Vinnie's Van-Go-Go's" restaurant in Georgia threw a man onto the floor then had him arrested after he touched her butt.

- Whatever happened to turning the other cheek? 


A palace insider has revealed that Queen Elizabeth hates Garlic and forbids anyone in the Royal Family to eat it for fear their breath will smell like garlic. 

- This explains their "Special Wave"... it's to blow away the garlic breath of Royal Family members who disobey the Queen. 


68 year old Caitlyn Jenner donned a black dress and heels at last night's ESPY Awards - which she attended with her 22 year old girlfriend Sophia. 

- What can those two crazy girls have in common? I mean, other than fake boobs? 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!


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