In honor of "Tax Day"... lots of eateries are offering I-Just-Paid-Uncle-Sam-Specials... like "Hooters", where kids 12 and under eat free. 

- And you can deduct the money you spent on a therapist for your nine year old on next years taxes. 

- It won't cost 'em much. If you take a 12 year old boy to Hooters, chances are good his eyes will be bigger than his stomach. 


James Comey's new book may be hugely anti-Trump, but Hillary Clinton aides are blaming Comey (again) for her election loss. 

- At this point, Kim Jong Un has more friends than Comey does. 


British dietitians claim that humans have a harder time losing weight in the winter because in pre-historic days, we had to hold onto fat to survive the cold. 

- The way this winter is going, I'm going to get my "Bathing Suit Body" back just in time for my local Labor Day Parade. 


According to a new financial report, if you had invested $10,000 in Amazon after it's IPO launch in May 1997 you would now have $5.8 million.  

- And if you sold that stock today - and have Prime - you'd get the check in just two days! 


A "green-eyed turtle that breathes through it's genitals" has been added to the endangered species list. 

- It's also been added to the list of "Most Popular Phrases Used By Women To Describe Harvey Weinstein".


A Boston College philosophy professor is offering extra credit to students who ask someone out on a date in person, go out on the date and have no physical contact.

- If they offered college credits for this in my day, I would have graduated from Syracuse as the Valedictorian. 


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!