Unknown.jpeg

As a Holiday Bonus, President Trump signed an Executive Order giving all Government employees Christmas Eve off.

- Which is great news for the two members of his Cabinet who haven’t resigned yet.

*****

A study by North Carolina State University found that chimpanzees have cleaner beds than humans do.

- It’s a toss up as to whose beds see the most “Monkey Business”.

- Chimps buy their sheets at “Bed, Bath & Bananas”.

*****

Facebook reportedly gave big tech companies EVEN MORE "intrusive access" to the personal data of its 2.2. billion users including private messages, usernames and contacts.

- Things are getting so bad at Facebook Mark Zuckerberg “unfriended” himself.

*****

A man in China who reportedly made a habit of sniffing his dirty socks each day contracted a serious fungal lung infection.

- So there’s actually a MEDICAL reason why we all shouldn’t be sniffin’ our socks everyday! I guess the guys in Grosse Pointe were ahead of the curve on this one.

*****

A 24 year old California man has been dubbed “The Most Popular Sperm Donor in the World” - fathering 18 children in four years because of (according to him) his looks, his education, and the fact that he doesn't charge for his services.

- He doesn’t charge for his services? What a charitable guy! I guess This IS The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

*****

Adult film star Stormy Daniels said she is “beyond excited and honored to share” that she will be featured in the next issue of Playboy.

- Something tells me this news isn’t the only thing Stormy will be “sharing”.

*****

What’s Santa’s favorite kind of potato chips?

- Kris Pringles

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

Comment