Tonight is Devil's Night! Or as Hillary Clinton calls it "Another Evening With Donald Trump as President".

*****

74-year-old Mick Jagger is reportedly "romancing" a 22-year-old film producer. 

- For example, Friday he showed up at her apartment with flowers and chocolate. The chocolate was actually Ex-Lax, but it's the thought that counts, right? 

*****

A study by the University of Connecticut found that people who smoke marijuana every day have 20% more sex.  

- No wonder Willie Nelson looks so tired all the time. 

*****

Chinese scientists believe that if Kim Jong Un explodes one more hydrogen bomb inside the mountain he uses to test them, it could destroy the mountain and leak radiation across the border. 

- Why can't Kim be like most 30-year-olds who live in their parents' basements playing video games??? 

*****

A driver has been banned from the Iditarod Dog Sled Race after several of his dogs tested positive for performance enhancing drugs. 

- Officials caught on when they overheard one of the dogs saying, "This is some good Shit Tzu". 

*****

A man who worked to repair homes damaged by Hurricane Harvey has contracted a flesh eating bacteria. 

- And hundreds of women who met with Harvey Weinstein have contracted an STD. 

*****

Have a great day... a BIG Happy Birthday to Daughter #3, Jill... and I'll see you back here Tuesday! 

-Dick