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The latest batch of WikiLeaks documents show that Hillary Clinton's campaign van has a bed in the back of it...sparking more questions about her health. 

- Bill's has a bed in the back as well, but it's also got a bumper sticker reading "If This Campaign Van's a Rockin', Don't Come a Knockin'!".  

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Melania Trump said in an interview that she was offended by the words her husband Donald used, but that they are "moving on". 

- They may be "moving on"... but according to the polls lately, it doesn't look like they'll be "moving" into the White House. 

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In response to the Clown hysteria sweeping the country, Target is no longer selling Clown masks. 

- So if you were planning on going as Clinton or Trump for Halloween, you're gonna have to buy your  costume at Walmart. 

- Why not just rent Bozo to go trick or treating for you... He's available for gigs. 

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A new survey found that 50% of men in the United States shave their legs. 

- Well yeah... I know I always want to look my best when I go in for a pedicure. 

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Meanwhile Gettysburg College held a class for male Freshmen telling them that "masculinity is toxic" and the worst three words a boy can hear growing up are "Be a man". 

- Sure... just like Abe Lincoln told the Union troops right before the Battle of Gettysburg. 

- The class was taught by a visiting professor... a Ms. C. Jenner. 

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Donald Trump is calling for a both Candidates to take a drug test before tomorrow night's final Presidential Debate. 

- I think that all of us who made it through the first two Presidential Debates are the ones who should be tested for drugs. 

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Al Gore and Climate Change activists are trying to have the criteria for Hurricanes to be changed so we will have more "Traumatic Weather Events" that can be blamed on humans. 

- Al made the announcement after flying his private jet halfway around the world to attend a "Cut The Emissions" Rally. 

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Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick 

 

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