A study by Knot.com found that the average American wedding now costs $31,000.
- That's cheap compared to the Divorce!
The President spoke at the Biden funeral Saturday.
- They wanted Hillary...but they couldn't afford her speaking fee.
American Pharaoh made history on Saturday when he became the first horse to win the Triple Crown in 37 years. His trainer says his reward will be "getting to have sex with 200 mare's a year".
- It's very similar to the signing bonuses offered to NBA players.
Two convicted murderers escaped a maximum-security prison in New York on Friday by using power tools to carve a tunnel.
- It's being called "The Electric Saw-Shank Redemption".
In the middle of California's ever worsening drought, the state's Governor, Jerry Brown, announced that he's showering less often.
- And in a show of solidarity, Woody Harrelson announced that he will continue his policy of not showering at all.
Indiana's first official Church of Cannabis held it's first masses this weekend.
- Afterwards, everyone gathered in the Social Hall for a Pot Luck dinner.
The residents of a street in Austin, Texas are thinking of changing the street name from "Bruce Jenner Lane" to something else.
- They're also considering putting in a U-Turn lane.
Have a great day and I'll see you back here Tuesday!