Donald Trump told a group in Tennessee that he always carries a gun and would shoot anyone who tried to harm him.
- He carries it in his hair.
The hot rumor in DC is that Joe Biden will announce that he's running for President sometime this week.
- It's a good thing Trump is the one packing heat and not Hillary.
Whole Foods announced that they'll stop selling pre-made Tilapia dinners made by prison inmates.
- That's a shame... The fish was so tender you could cut it with a shiv.
A CNBC survey found that 20% of Uber users are holding off on buying a car because the App makes travel so convenient.
- But considering what Uber charges, users could probably afford a Porsche for six months.
An ad campaign in California is accusing the hook-up App Tinder for spreading STDs.
- Remember the good old days when it was just Madonna that was responsible for spreading STDs?
- And most the the STD's are contracted in the back of Uber cars.
A new study found that while teenage boys and girls text the same amount (167 texts a day), it affects girls grades badly, but not boys. They say it's because girls use texts to nurture friendships while boys just text important "stuff".
- Like "Check out hot babe texting in front row".
Florida police say the person responsible for a hit and run last month was former Partridge Family star David Cassidy.
- Admit it. You thought I was going to say Danny Bonaduce.
Have a great day and I'll see you back here Tuesday!