The NBA banned the LA Clippers' owner Donald Sterling for life as a result of the racist comments he made that were caught on tape. 

- This will free him up to watch the games in his family room and rest on his laurels as well as his hands on his stomach. 


Michele Obama's two day hotel stay in China cost taxpayers $222,000. 

- That breaks down to $111,000 from Column A and $111,000 from Column B. 

- I had no idea the prices were so high at the Beijing Best Eastern. 


Today, April 30, is National Honesty Day. 

- If you want to see how dishonest people are the rest of the year, just check out the profiles on 


Despite rumors of an impending engagement, Prince Harry and his girlfriend Cressida Bonas have broken up after two years of dating. 

- Apparently Cressida got tired of dressing up like Eva Braun every time Harry put on his Hitler uniform.  

- She's asked for privacy, and he's asked for the Charlie Sheen Suite at his favorite hotel in Vegas. 


North Korea's Kim Jong Un told his military leaders that his goal is to beat the U.S. on the battlefield. 

- He also set a goal of becoming six feet tall but that's not gonna happen either. 

- For the time being, he'll just stick with his battle plan of executing all of his relatives. 


Craig Ferguson announced that he's leaving his CBS late night talk show when his contract expires in December. 

- Is it just me or do late night shows change hosts more often than Bruce Jenner changes his face.?  


Have a great day and I'll see you back here Thursday.