Okay…Spring may not be here to stay - but it’s stopped by for a visit. Unfortunately, unlike relatives over the holidays, it’s not staying long. Regardless, I’m proudly putting on my black socks and sandals. (A great look anytime of the year!) 

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Police in Connecticut arrested a 71-year-old woman on prostitution charges. 

- This finally explains why they call it “The World’s Oldest Profession”. 

- She puts the “Walker” in Street Walker. 

*****

A Pennsylvania man was buried with a Burger King Whopper after his funeral procession stopped at the drive-up window. 

- His ex-wife showed up during the eulogy and yelled, “It should have been a Whopper Jr.!” 

- In a similar story, another man was buried at sea…along with a McDonald’s Fillet ‘O Fish. 

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Arnold Schwarzenegger will be giving a series of motivational talks in Australia. 

- Well he’s certainly an expert of things “Down Under”. 

- He’s really trying to clean up his act. Wait…doesn’t he have a maid for that? 

*****

It’s estimated that the family dog is the cause of at least 150 family arguments a year. 

- Most of which begin with the words “It wasn’t me…”

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In an interview with NBC, country singer Mindy McCreedy denied shooting her boyfriend to death. 

- You can hear all about it in her new song “I Didn’t Shoot My Boyfriend To Death”. 

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Ashton Kutcher was hospitalized after going on a fruit-only diet while preparing for a movie role where he plays Steve Jobs. 

- I thought an Apple a day was supposed to keep the doctor away.

- He was so dehydrated, EMT’s immediately put in an iV. 

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On this day in 1933 the radio series “The Lone Ranger” made its radio debut. The program originated on WXYZ radio here in Detroit. (I worked there from 1968 to 1978).

- The Lone Ranger and his “faithful Indian companion” Tonto, got along well…except they disagreed about the country’s immigration policy. 

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday! 

-Dick 

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