The most expensive (and dangerous) muiscal in Broadway history, the $65 million “Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark” was supposed to open officially over the weekend.  But actors were still dangling helplessly from wires, so the producers decided to keep it in previews for another 5 weeks while charging up to 300 bucks a ticket. Critics have blasted the show, which features music from U2 frontman Bono, as “erratic”, “incoherent” and “a shrill insipid mess”.  

- How can this thing miss?  Who wouldn’t want to see a guy in red and blue tights dance to Bono Songs?

- Bono himself admits the show needs tweaking saying, “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”. 

- How about cancelling the Bono songs and make Spiderman dance to music by the Black Eyed Peas and Christina Aquilera?  How could that go wrong?

It seems to me if they would have used some Lawrence Welk tunes and called it “Spiderman: Turn Off The Bubble Machine” it would have worked out better.