R.I.P. Tony Curtis

He died of cardiac arrest at his home in Las Vegas at the age of 85. He was married to Janet Leigh, of “Psycho” fame, and Jamie Leigh Curtis is their daughter.  Tony, Jack Lemmon and Marilyn Monroe starred in “Some Like It Hot” - which was cited by The American Film Institute as the funniest film ever made. The line he is best known for, which he took a lot of grief over, was taken from a Medieval-set movie done early in his career called “The Prince Who Was a Thief”.  The line was:  “Yonder lies the castle of my fodder”, which Tony delivered in his natural Bronx accent. 

It’s Rhyme Time!

Researcher Albert Jack has written a book called “Pop Goes The Weasel” that reveals the forgotten origins of nursery rhymes.  For instance, “Humpty Dumpty” was the name of King Charles I’s biggest cannon that was finally blown off a wall during battle, and “Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub” was inspired by a carnival peep show.  It wasn’t a gay sex show; it was originally “Three maids in a tub” but the Victorians sanitized it by making them a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. 

Before the show they used to announce, “If you experience a candlestick lasting longer than four hours, go immediately to the town blood-letter”. 

“Three Blind Mice” – originally titled “Twelve Blind Mice” was based on the jury in the O.J. Simpson trial.

Don’t even ask about “Wee Willie Winkie”.

McFabulous News!

A New York photographer tried to prove that McDonald’s Happy Meals are full of preservatives by leaving one on a shelf and photographing it every three days.  Over 18 weeks later, the burger and fries looked the same as they did on day one.  But scientists say that doesn’t mean it’s full of preservatives.  They say it’s just over 50% fat, which is low in moisture and prevents the food from growing mold and decaying. 

Which is great news for all you mom’s with minivans… If you’re hungry, just pick up that month-old fry on the floor of the backseat and enjoy!

So now parents can feel good about going to Mickey D’s!  You’re not filling your kids with preservatives, you’re just simply setting them on the road to obesity! 

NOTE:  This story reminded me of a YouTube video I saw a while back that takes place in a fast food burger place.  Just click and enjoy! 


Oh, Canada!

A judge in Ontario just struck down all of Canada’s laws against prostitution.  The case was brought by several ladies of the evening and a dominatrix who argued that bans on “pay for play” sex force women to work the streets exposing them to robbery and assault. The female judge agreed, although her ruling was suspended for 30 days while a Superior Court reviews the case.  One of the hookers has a celebration planned; She said, “I’m going to spank some ass”. 

THIS JUST IN:  Charlie Sheen has decided to move to Canada and re-name his TV show “Two and a Half Women”. 

If this works like Canada’s health care system, you can hire a hooker, but it will take her 6 months to show up. 

He’s Great At Tooting His Own Horn! 

One of Brazil’s most popular clowns, Francisco Silva, aka “Grumpy the Clown” is running for Parliament. His slogan is “It Can’t Be Worse Than It Is Now” – and amazingly he’s leading in the polls.  His opponents are trying to have him disqualified because he can’t read or write.

Hey… none of our Congressmen read the Health Care Bill and they’re still in office!

On the bright side, if elected he’ll save taxpayers a lot of money.  The entire parliament can ride to work with him in his tiny car.

He’s great at shaking hands, kissing babies, and pulling a really, really, long string of colored hankerchiefs out of his sleeve.

People with big red noses are nothing new in politics.  Remember Ted Kennedy?

A Job That’s To Die For!

Politico.com reports that in both Houses of Congress, it’s a long-standing practice to give a year’s salary to any member who dies.  That means that next year, Sen. Robert Byrd’s kids and grandkids will split the $193,400 he would have been paid if he hadn’t died in office at 92.

So we keep paying a deceased senator his full salary for doing nothing?  Isn’t that what we do with the LIVING senators???

You have to hand it to these men and women; they not only rig it so they’re impossible to vote out… we have to keep paying them after they die.

Today’s Almanac

On this day in 1955, James Dean died in a car crash while driving his Porsche at 85 mph just two hours after getting a speeding ticket. 

On the bright side, he didn’t have to pay the fine! 


Have a great day… drive safely… and we’ll see you right back here tomorrow, the 1st day of October!

- Dick